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Credits[]

Official translation from Grimoire NieR: Revised Edition.
Written by Jun Eishima[1]
Concept by cavia/Yoko Taro[1]
Translated by Casey Loe[1]

Characters[]

Around the World in 80 Days ver.1.00[]


The head that came rolling and soaring through the sky
is now a head that rolls and soars around the world.

DAY 1


I gotta say, it sure is hard to move around in the desert.

Ooof! Aw man, I'm stuck in the sand again. Okay, then, here we gooooooo!

It's funny to think about how glad I was to see sand after I was sent flying. I mean, if I'd landed on top of a boulder or something, it probably wouldn't have ended well no matter how unkillable my sister's body is.

Still, I never imagined it would be so hard to move around in sand! I mean, the Masked People always made it look so gosh dang easy! And sure, Nier had trouble with it from time to time, but he was still way faster than I am now.

I know I keep saying this, but I really gotta find myself a new body...

Er, but how am I gonna do that when the only thing around here is sand? Hmm... Maybe I could use magic to turn it into a body? Except wait, how am I going to cast the spell without hands? And for that matter, I don't even have my staff anymore. Boy, this sure is a pickle!

Nope! I'm clearly going about this all wrong. Rather than getting all up in my head about it, I should just give it a try. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? I mean, I don't need a staff to focus my magical power, so I can just do it in the sand liiike thiiiiis aaaand...

WHOA!

Oh wow, oh wow, oh wow! That kicked up one heck of a sand cloud! Guess that's deserts for you. You can whip up a sandstorm anywhere, anytime! Er, I'd better do something about this!

. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Okay, the cloud finally settled. WHEW!

Well, at least I know I've still got plenty of magic even without a staff or hands, so that's good news! Also, I made myself a proper body, so now I can walk aga...

Huh? What the...?! Bwah! I'm sinking! My head's sinking!

Awww, my body fell apart. Well, I guess you can't expect much in the way of durability when you make things out of sand. But at least I know I can use magic, so if I can just find stronger materials, I should be able to make a stronger body. Yeah, that'll totally work! Let's maybe just chalk this up as a learning experience.

Right, then! Time to get myself somewhere that's not just sand. I actually wish this sand was dirt so I could roll on it, because right now...

Nooo! I'm stuck again!

DAY 9


I FINALLY made it out of the desert! I really wish it hadn't taken me so long, because I got soooo tired of staring at the same scenery all the time. In fact, I don't ever want to see another grain of sand again!

Anyway, at least I'm done with all that now, although this new area is pretty rocky. Oh, and hard. In fact, it might be a little TOO hard, and it's for SURE too bumpy, which means getting around isn't really any easier.

And it hurts! Ow ow ow! I keep hitting bumps!

I tell you what, if I can't walk around on a proper pair of legs, I'm gonna run out of HP in no time. I'd better make a body toot sweet! Thankfully, if these hard rocks are good for anything, it should be for making a nice strong body. Now, then...

Hiii-ya!

Yeah, without a staff, my spellcasting is a little wonky. Was hiii-ya the right magic word for this? Didn't really feel like it was, but hey, at least my magic still works, so let's just call it good.

Aaaand there we are! Boy, that body sure does look tough! Now it's time to race back to Nier and the others. Better hurry, too, 'cause Kainé and Weiss are probably already at each other's throats.

Uh, okay? Why am I not moving? What's going on?

. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Dang it. This body's way too heavy.

DAY 17


Well, it sure took me long enough to make it out of that rocky area—and I think my head lost a lot of HP in the process. But hey, all's well that ends well, right?

I'm finally back on dirt that's not too hard and not too soft. What a treat! Oh, and there's also a lovely lake here, plus way more waterbirds than you find in the northern plains. Maybe it's easier for them to survive here without any Shades around? Regardless, I'm sure I can find the right materials in a place like this.

Still, what should I use? I need something strong enough to support my head, but that isn't too heavy. Light and strong, light and strong... Oh! That's it! I can use the feathers of the waterbirds!

See, I read in a book once that bird feathers are basically a harder form of skin. They're also super flexible, so if I gather a bunch together and magic them up, they should be plenty strong. And best of all, they're light! If you want to move fast, you gotta be light.

Lessee... With so many birds around, I can just wait downwind and get all the feathers I can handle. Bundles of 'em. Bindles of 'em! Birdles of 'em?

Hee hee! I'll have to remember that—I bet it'll give Nier a good laugh! Anyhoo, time to sit back and wait.

DAY 24


. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Okay, this isn't working AT ALL. I haven't gotten a single feather! Maybe it isn't molting season?

Well, these birds have left me no choice—I'm gonna have to catch 'em and pluck 'em. Oh, but just a little! I don't want the poor little guys to not be able to fly anymore. That'd be cruel. Instead, I'll just take a few feathers from each one.

Anyway, I'd better get started. Here goes nothing!

Oh, wait. How am I supposed to catch birds without hands? I mean, maybe I—

BWAAAAAAH! I'm falling! I'm falling! I'm falling into the lake!

. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Well, THAT was terrible. I could have caught a nasty cold! Thankfully, I just ended up soaking my body—er, I mean, my head, I guess. Still, at least now I know my head can swim, so I don't have to worry about drowning.

Oh man, if Nier ever falls in the water again, I can RESCUE HIM! That would be so cool.

DAY 26


Well, I've only managed to gather a few feathers—and by that, I mean maybe enough to make one finger of a new body? Ugh. Maybe I should just make some clothes instead. After all, one's personal appearance matters! Even if I do end up smelling kinda like a bird...

Huh? What's that wolf coming over here for? Hey, stop it, wolf! I'm not edible! You get that, right? Listen to what I'm telling you! I'm not a bird, okay?! I'm not a... BWAAAAAAAH!

Ugh. Well, THAT was terrifying. Thankfully my head's okay, but the wolf ran off with all my feathers. What a thoughtless wolf! Doesn't it know it can't eat feathers?

Also, I thought wolves mostly lived in the desert, so maybe that fella split off from the pack? I guess he did seem different from the kind that attacked the Masked People. He's also probably not all mean and cranky like they were... Probably.

DAY 31


Oh geez, now what? Not another wolf!

No, wait. That actually doesn't look like a wolf, although it certainly IS a large beast of some sort. Wait, what was this animal called again? Some kind of predator in the cat family, right? Some kind of...

Gyah! This is no time for taxonomy! I need to get out of here before this thing eats me! I mean, just look at those claws! If it goes after me with those, even my sister's body might not be immortal enough to survive!

BWAAAAHHH!

Huh? Hey, it didn't eat me! It just sent me rolling after poking me a few times. But oh geez, here it comes again.

BWAAAAHHH!

Hang on. Is this thing playing with me? Does this feline predator think I'm a toy?

BWAAAAHHH!

Okay, seriously, quit rolling me already! I'm not a ball!

BWAAAAHHH!

Oh, that's right! I can use magic! Time to cast a spell and fly away!

. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Phew! I managed to get away. That's a relief, although my head's still spinning something fierce...

DAY 33


I really wish I'd figured out I could fly sooner. If I had, I wouldn't have hurt myself on all those rocks and it wouldn't have taken me so long to get out of the desert! What a total goof on my part.

Speaking of regrets, I don't think I've been going about this whole materials-for-my-body thing the right way. Maybe just trying to whip a body together out of whatever single substance is nearby isn't the answer. Like, even that store in the Junk Heap uses all kinds of different materials to enhance their weapons, right?

Geez, if I knew this was going to happen, I'd have paid more attention to what they did in that store. But the thing is, that little brother creeps me out. Each time we visit, I feel like his eyes get more and more crazy. I wonder if the rumor is true that he cut off his own arm?

Think, Emil! Think! Where did Nier get all of his materials?! I feel like he dug some out of the ground, maybe? And then picked up others on the beach? The important thing is that it was a slow and steady sort of effort. I should try to learn from that.

DAY 59


I've traveled so far I can't even see the lake anymore. Every day, I'm somewhere new I've never been. I know I can't have traveled all around the world, but maybe I've done, like, a fourth of it?

Once I learned to fly, I thought it'd be nothing but safe and pleasant days ahead—but air travel is a LOT less smooth than I thought it would be. There are all sorts of birds of prey and winged Shades and stuff in the skies, even if I can fight them off with my spells.

Thing is, the more baggage I collect—by which I mean materials—the harder it gets to fight. I'm using magic to carry my stuff, magic to fly, and magic to fight, which is three things at once! It makes my head get all mixed up—or maybe it's the magic that gets mixed up? Like those times where I'm shooting beams out of my eyes...

Anyway, that's why the more materials I get, the more I've been traveling on land. They say if you want to find something, you've got to keep your eyes to the ground, after all, and I figure that's even more true if your eyes are literally rolling on the ground. Heck, I'm finding all sorts of stuff, including iron ore, natural rubber, and clay. Plus, the beaches have fun surprises like driftwood and black pearls!

On the downside, it sure wasn't fun when I rolled into that giant spider...

DAY 66


I made it to Seafront! I'm finally back! I know Nier's village is only a little ways from here and I've got tons of materials, so I'm just gonna fly the rest of the way. I can't wait to see Nier again! Oh, and Kainé and Weiss, too, of course.

Hmm? Why is an entire flock of seagulls flying over here? Oh no! They don't think I'm intruding on their territory, do they?

Please stay back, seagulls! This is all just a big misunderstanding! I'm serious, you guys! You don't understand how hard it is to fly when I'm holding so much stuff!

. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Well, I ended up falling into the ocean. Seagulls are a lot more aggressive than you'd think. I had no idea.

Yeah, this is all just really unfortunate. Once this seawater dries, I'm gonna be all sticky and gross. Oh, but look! That's a rusty bucket! Nier uses these to upgrade his weapons, so I bet I could use it to upgrade my body! What a lucky break, huh? I guess sinking into the ocean now and then isn't such a bad thing.

Oh, hey! I know that fish! It's a Dunkleosteus! Nier had a heck of a time landing one of those guys, even after all the lessons from that old man and a perfect cast. But more importantly...

Hey! You can't eat me! Don't you see how hard my face is? You'll break your teeth! Okay, now you're trying to swallow me whole, so stop it before—NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Sheesh! I'm lucky I got out of that alive. Time to get that new body made so nothing like that ever happens again.

DAY 80


With all the materials I gathered, I should be able to make a body even better than my old one. It's gonna be super strong, but also VERY cool.

Well, better get started! I'll just lay out the materials on the ground and give 'em a good blast of magic.

HIIII-YA!

Huh?

. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Boy, I do NOT have a good feeling about this. Why is smoke pouring out of that stopped clock—and why are sparks popping off my pyrite like crazy? Did my spell fail?!

Noooo! It's burning! It's all burning! The old schoolbooks are going up like kindling! Oh gosh, is it going to explode?!

BWAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!

. . .

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . . .

Ow.

Ah geez, that blast really sent me flying. But wait, am I in the desert again?! I AM!

Well, back to square one, I guess. Oh hey, now I totally get what that expression means! It's like a board game where you roll the dice, land on the big black X, and get sent back to the first square you started on. Huh. Never really thought about that before.

It reminds me of how Sebastian used to say, "You are far more talented at breaking things than making things, Master Emil." I guess he really was right about that, huh?

At this rate, I may not ever get my new body made—and if I take any longer, Kainé and Weiss will have moved on to actual bloodshed by the time I find them. I mean, Kainé's real quick to resort to violence, and Weiss doesn't know when to stop talking, so...

Okay, Emil! Pull it together! You need to get back to Nier!

But first, I gotta get out of this desert. Which means...

Here we goooooooo!

References[]

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